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Why Do Sons Forget Their Mothers? 7 Most Common Reasons

How often have you heard that there is no stronger and more sincere bond than the one between the mother and her son?

That started to sound like some general quote, but that unique bond between a mother is really tender and unbreakable, gentle and strong, soft and loud all at the same time.

However, even the strongest bonds can fail, and that’s why it’s the most painful when they break.

If the son forgets about his mother, the mother will wonder what she did wrong and why the son no longer loves her as before. One thing is sure, this is extremely painful for any mother.

What are some reasons why a son might forget his mother? While it could be due to changing priorities as he grows up, conflicts, resentment, or misunderstandings often create distance between them.

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If you are a mother whose son has forgotten about you and moved away, it is certainly not easy for you to read this article, but we will try in the best possible way to explain all the potential reasons for that situation.

It’s essential to understand why this is happening to cope with the situation and potentially improve your relationship with your son. Keep reading for more information.

7 Common Reasons Why Sons Forget About Their Mothers

Oh, how beautiful and simple everything was when your little boy was focused on you, and you were the center of his world.

As he grew up, his priorities changed. However, his mother being at the bottom of his list was unexpected.

Mother’s Day was a significant holiday in your family, but it has lost meaning since your son stopped acknowledging it a while back.

Let us explain in more detail why sons forget about their mothers. You will surely resonate with your situation with your son when you read these lines.

1. Shifting Priorities and Life Transitions

One of the main reasons why children move away from their families. Although this reason is unrelated to the son’s resentment towards the mother, it must not be neglected.

As men mature, they encounter new obligations like pursuing education, starting careers, and establishing families. This is normal and natural.

However, these significant life changes can consume their time and attention, causing them to unintentionally overlook their relationship with their mothers.

No matter how much your son is focused on his career and success, shouldn’t he still remember his mother? Does the pressure of the hustle culture take a toll on family relationships?

If you and your son no longer live in the same place because he moved to a bigger city early in search of his life path, you probably rarely spend time together.

What bothers you is that he rarely calls you. How often should a son actually call his mother? You continually ask yourself that. You don’t expect him to spend hours on the phone with you, but at least every other day, a short conversation with him would mean a lot to you.

2. Lack of Emotional Expression

Sometimes, men struggle to express their emotions due to societal norms or upbringing.

Societal expectations often discourage men from openly expressing their emotions, which can gradually fade their emotional connections, including their relationship with their mothers.

Was your son encouraged to express his emotions openly while growing up? A strong father figure can additionally contribute to such a pattern of behavior.

If your family didn’t talk much about emotions, then don’t be surprised that your son has grown into a man who finds it difficult to express himself emotionally to everyone, including you.

3. Past Conflicts and Unresolved Issues

Conflicts are inevitable in every relationship, including between a son and a mother.

Unresolved issues, misunderstandings, or disagreements can create emotional barriers between mothers and sons, causing them to drift apart.

Did you and your son have frequent arguments during his upbringing? Despite your good intentions, finding common ground was difficult.

Parents often need clarification on what they think is best for their child with what their child actually wants.

Because of this, there will undoubtedly be conflicts, and If these conflicts are left unaddressed, they can contribute to the perceived forgetfulness of sons toward their mothers.

4. The Need for Independence

A son wants to be independent; that’s quite normal. But does he need to exclude you from his life to achieve that independence?

Are you the type of parent who gives everything to the child, especially material things?

That may have been great for your son when he was a kid, but now he’s grown up and realized that he doesn’t have the skills for everything that adulthood entails. He blames you for that because you didn’t prepare him enough for life.

Even now, you treat him like a little kid instead of guiding him to be his own person and live his own life.

It’s even worse if you were that overcontrolling strict parent who didn’t allow the child to do anything independently.

Your son realized he could never be independent under your influence and started distancing himself from you.

5. Lack of Support

This refers to the lack of support on your part towards your son.

Did your conversations usually end in an argument? And the cause of that conflict is connected with the fact that you disagree with your son’s life choices.

Those choices may relate to your son’s job and career because you feel he could have done much better “if only he had listened to you.”

If you object to your son’s fiancee and don’t support the relationship, it’s even more offensive.

Your son is hurt by all this, so he decided it is better to reduce his contact with you when he can no longer talk to you about anything.

6. Emotional Trauma

We are discussing more extreme cases here and hope it is not the case with you and your son.

Experiencing significant emotional trauma during childhood or throughout life can impact a son’s ability to form and maintain relationships, including the one with their mother.

Traumatic events such as abuse, neglect, parents’ divorce, or witnessing domestic violence can lead to psychological defense mechanisms that cause sons to forget or dissociate from their mothers to cope with the pain.

Due to these circumstances, your son may not have an emotional connection with you and has decided to exclude you from his life.

7. Influence of Another Person 

We don’t want to blame anyone, but have you noticed any changes in your relationship with your son since he got married?

Again, we are not talking about stereotypes, but you know that it is not rare that daughters-in-law disagree with their mothers-in-law

Your son needs to live his life, and you need to accept that another woman came into his life, but that doesn’t mean he should forget about you. That’s just ungrateful on his part.

What Should You Do When Your Son Forgets About You?

When a son forgets his mother, it can be challenging and heartbreaking. 

You want it to change because you miss your son but don’t know where to start. Wouldn’t it be nice if he could at least remember your birthday?

Here are some strategies that can help:

1. Initiate Open and Honest Communication

Don’t just expect him to call you first, but be the first to reach out, even if you’re not on good terms.

It is crucial to have open and honest conversations to resolve any issues or conflicts with your son.

Both parties should communicate openly, listen actively, and aim for mutual understanding. This approach can encourage healing, forgiveness, and relationship repair.

2. Show Empathy and Understanding

If you don’t show understanding, empathy, and support toward your son, your relationship with him won’t improve.

Let’s be realistic; your son will undoubtedly not want to spend time with you if he feels you are not supporting or holding him back in his goals.

Why would he want to spend time in an atmosphere where he feels annoyed and hurt?

Even if you think the opposite of your son, support and understand him because that is most important.

3. Have Realistic Expectations

If the bond is severely damaged, how much can be restored?

This is especially true if your son suffered emotional or physical abuse as a child.

When communication alone fails to improve estrangement or forgetfulness, seeking professional help from therapists or counselors can be beneficial.

Even if it’s not your fault that your son has decided to forget you, don’t be aggressive, but still be understanding.

Don’t expect him to give up his job and family to spend time with you. Who still has time for long phone conversations? Sometimes a photo can say more than words.

Most Importantly – Be Patient and Persistent

Rebuilding a relationship takes time and effort from both parties involved.

It’s important to celebrate progress and approach setbacks with empathy and determination.

Rebuilding a strained mother-son relationship requires mutual effort, empathy, and a commitment to healing and growth. We hope you will succeed in it. Good luck!