An affair at work? It sounds like some cliché from romantic books, movies, and TV series. That probably happens to some fictional characters and not to you, right?
You thought that until recently, but with your husband constantly talking about this female colleague of his and how amazing she is, you can’t help but wonder: Is there something more to it?
Why does your husband keep talking about his female coworker? While it could be just a professional relationship, there may be more to it. The line between private and business relationship may have shifted, and your husband is fascinated by his female colleague, so he can’t stop talking about her.
Even though you don’t have any proof, it’s no wonder you always feel jealous when you have to hear about her.
And the statistics are not in your favor because, according to Forbes, an incredible 60% of adults have had a workplace romance, and 40% have cheated on their current partner with a coworker.
These vast numbers are definitely not something you should ignore, given that you already have reasons to be suspicious.
In this article, we will explain in more detail why your husband keeps talking about his female colleague and give you useful tips on dealing with that challenging situation.
Why Does Your Husband Keep Talking About His Female Coworker?
There are two main reasons why your husband keeps talking about his female colleague, and they are:
Strictly Professional Relationship
It’s true that even in a purely professional relationship, your husband may talk frequently about a female colleague if they work closely together on a project.
They may collaborate on projects, share ideas, or discuss office dynamics.
Your husband tends to share everything with you, including details about his new project. However, he may not realize that his excitement can sometimes evoke jealousy in you, even though there is no real reason.
There is Something More
This is what you were afraid of.
There is something more between your husband and his female coworker.
It could be flirting in the workplace, micro-cheating like sending flirtatious messages, or a full-blown affair.
Since this is a more serious situation, we will focus on this possibility in this article.
8 Signs You Should Be Worried If Your Husband Keeps Talking About His Female Colleague
Even if you don’t have concrete proof that your husband is having an affair at work, some signs are huge red flags that you must pay attention to.
Those signs are:
1. Your Husband Gets All Excited When He Talks About Her
You’ve noticed your husband gets enthusiastic when he talks about his female colleague.
Your husband blushes and giggles like a teenager in love at mentioning her name.
Not only is she excellent at her job, but she also enjoys fitness, traveling, and cooking. She truly is a superwoman. Yeah, right.
He tells you how amazing, organized, intelligent, and capable she is. Maybe he even tells you that she is beautiful.
Your husband talks about how another woman is beautiful in front of you? Huge red flag!
2. Your Husband Defends Her
He constantly needs to defend that colleague.
In addition to protecting her at work, he defends her from you.
Of course, you won’t be happy that your husband keeps talking about her. You might even call her some insulting names in a fit of rage.
Your husband will start to defend her and maybe even tell you that you are mean for insulting his favorite female colleague.
3. Your Husband Doesn’t Want You to Visit Him at Work
What is he doing there when you are not allowed to visit him?
At the very mention of it, your husband has a list of potential excuses for not visiting him at work.
No wonder you hate his job for all that.
If you went there, you would probably discover that your husband does not respect boundaries with a female coworker.
4. Your Husband Suddenly Loves His Job
Going to work is no longer such a nightmare for your husband.
Suddenly you have a workaholic in the house who has no problem staying even longer.
Previously, your husband would go to work feeling drained and unhappy, but now he approaches work excitedly and joyfully.
How does this change happen when a new female colleague comes to his department with whom he has to work together? It’s too obvious to be a coincidence.
5. Your Husband Spends a lot of Time With Her
Your husband often ends up working alongside her. Whether they’re on the same shift or collaborating on a project together.
Not to mention business trips, which have become more and more frequent.
You often wonder if all these additional educations and team buildings are really necessary, or is it just an opportunity for employees to live a fantasy life?
Although the point of business trips is strictly professional, many employees perceive them as an escape from boring life routines and a return to carefree youthful days. Such a mindset can lead to cheating.
Let’s not forget all those celebrations and holidays at your husband’s company. How does he have to be right next to that colleague he keeps talking about in every photo?
And that suspicious smile of theirs that gets on your nerves…
6. Your Husband is Always on The Phone
Everyone is on their smartphones too much these days, but that’s a whole other topic.
Your husband is always on his phone, and when you ask him what’s going on, he says it’s some joke from work that you wouldn’t understand.
He is defending his phone with his life, so you don’t see what he is hiding.
You hate to invade someone else’s privacy, even if it’s your husband, but what is he hiding so much?
You are particularly annoyed by the notifications he receives at night. Who has to write him so much in the middle of the night? You know who.
7. Your Husband Is Too Friendly With Her On Social Media
Too friendly? Better words to describe it are too flirtatious.
You understand it’s hard to avoid work colleagues on social networks. But you also have work colleagues on Instagram, and you don’t act like that.
After you stalked your husband’s female colleague on social networks in detail, you concluded that there is no photo of her without a 👍 from your husband. The only photos he skipped were those where she is with another man, possibly her boyfriend or husband.
Your husband especially liked her photos from the beach because he commented on them with a 🔥 emoji.
8. Your Husband Has Changed
Lately, your husband has been acting differently.
He’s been dressing up more, exploring new interests, and listening to new music. This is a significant change from his previous behavior, which was more consistent and predictable. Suspicious.
However, the most difficult thing for you is that he has changed his behavior towards you.
He became too distant and disinterested. His effort in marriage was reduced to a minimum.
Feeling neglected and unloved can be hard to endure. You may be questioning how much longer you can handle it.
What To Do When Your Husband Keeps Talking About His Female Colleague?
In addition to not wanting to hear more about her, you also suspect your husband’s potential affair with her.
Here’s what you need to do:
1. Make it Clear to Your Husband That You Don’t Want to Hear About Her
She’s this, she’s that, she’s awesome, blah blah…
You don’t want to hear about her anymore; your husband must understand that.
We know you’ll appear paranoid and jealous but you have every right to be.
Why should your peace be disturbed daily by stories about a woman you suspect has something to do with your husband? You don’t need that energy in your life.
2. Set Clear Boundaries for Your Husband
It’s great that you believe the issue in your marriage is minor and hasn’t caused significant harm.
Your husband must learn the boundaries of his behavior with that female colleague and others.
Their relationship must be professional, meaning no private conversations or messaging outside working hours.
Flirting or going out for coffee alone with that female colleague, no way!
Your husband’s phone should not be kept from you. If you ask what he is looking at on their phone, he should be willing to show you.
On social networks, your husband must behave decently, not like some pervert who comments on women’s pictures.
Remember – You Are Not Paranoid if Something Hurts You
Even if your husband is not having an affair, that does not give him the right to talk non-stop about his female colleague and by no means to overstep the boundaries of decent behavior with her.
The effects on a marriage can be enormous, and it’s no wonder you’re fighting for something you care about.
However, if your husband continues the same despite all your efforts, it may be time to consider whether you see yourself in such a marriage in the future.