The importance of humor in relationships is emphasized a lot.
When you see some random survey on the street or online polls where girls are asked what is most important to them in a partner in a relationship, they will often mention humor. It will even turn out that humor is more important to them than physical appearance.
When you think about it, it makes sense because we always need someone in our life to make us laugh.
However, your boyfriend doesn’t make you laugh with his jokes. On the contrary, he annoys you completely.
Why does your boyfriend’s humor annoy you? The main reason may be that you have a completely different sense of humor. However, it’s also possible that his humor is offensive, overly sarcastic, or he makes jokes at inappropriate times or targets you in his jokes.
You think your boyfriend is a smart guy with whom you would like a serious relationship, but his jokes are a huge turn-off for you.
Is your boyfriend’s terrible sense of humor a deal breaker for your relationship? Keep reading this article to find out.
5 Main Reasons Why Your Boyfriend’s Humor Annoys You
Instead of making you laugh with his sense of humor, your boyfriend makes you angry or even makes you cry.
This indicates that something is wrong with his jokes, as they seriously affect your relationship.
What are the most common reasons why your boyfriend’s humor annoys you:
1. Different Sense of Humour
If you haven’t figured it out already, you and your boyfriend have entirely different senses of humor.
Your boyfriend loves raunchy humor, while you, on the other hand, love a bit more refined comedy.
He laughs his ass off at rude jokes, some of which are outdated and didn’t age well. You find his sense of humor and jokes immature.
It is apparent in your movie preferences that you and your boyfriend have some differences.
Your boyfriend enjoys rude comedies such as “American Pie,” “Hangover,” and “Superbad,” with his favorite movie being “Jackass.” You may recall feeling uncomfortable when you watched “Jackass” together, as their stunts are notorious for being outrageous. While your boyfriend found it entertaining, you may have felt ill. This may have led to a disagreement about his choice of movie.
What about your sense of humor? You like a bit more intellectual comedy, not that rude humor your boyfriend loves.
Could this potentially cause issues in your relationship because you get the impression that you and your boyfriend are incompatible?
2. Offensive and Insensitive Humor
Humor should indeed be free, but it must not hurt someone.
Not only is your boyfriend’s humor offensive, but his humor is also insensitive and crosses boundaries.
Offensive humor relies on subjects, topics, or content considered socially inappropriate, disrespectful, or hurtful to some individuals or groups.
We hope your boyfriend is not so extreme in his “humor” that he targets sensitive issues such as race, religion, disabilities, sexuality, etc.
If your boyfriend’s jokes touch on these topics, you can easily wonder what you are doing with such an insensitive person in a relationship.
3. Overly Sarcastic Humor
Sarcasm and irony can be combined for effective humor. Those who balance them well are often witty. However, sarcasm can also be a double-edged sword.
If your boyfriend’s humor relies heavily on sarcasm, it might irritate your nerves.
Sarcastic people usually think they have the best sense of humor and believe they are smarter than others. They also take criticism very hard. Imagine telling your boyfriend how bland his humor is. He will consider you less intellectual because you don’t understand his highly intelligent sarcasm.
Also, your boyfriend’s sarcastic humor is probably based on deliberately twisting the views of others because he is an irreparable contrarian.
When it comes to irony, you don’t know when your boyfriend is being ironic or just joking, and sometimes it’s both making you even more confused.
4. Wrong Time and Place for Humor
Some people are talented at knowing when and where to tell a joke. Unfortunately, your boyfriend is not one of them.
If your boyfriend makes jokes at inappropriate times or in situations where you expect seriousness, it can be irritating.
You’re not uptight and like to laugh at a good joke, but your boyfriend is over the top.
When you introduced your boyfriend to your parents, he made everyone uncomfortable with his awkward jokes. Obviously, he left a terrible impression, and your parents were not pleased with your choice.
It can be unpleasant when your boyfriend tries to be a stand-up comedian but isn’t talented.
He may have watched some stand-up acts or even performed at a local bar, but now he believes he’s the next Dave Chappelle or Chris Rock.
Because he forced his lame jokes many times, you felt embarrassed in front of your friends. In fact, everyone was uncomfortable with his overly sexual jokes.
What further annoys you is that your boyfriend forces his incredible sense of humor even more after a few drinks.
The combination of your boyfriend’s lousy humor mixed with alcohol has ruined many special occasions for you.
5. You are the Main Target of Your Boyfriend’s Humor
It’s all fun and jokes for your boyfriend, right?
Humor can also be toxic in a relationship when directed at one partner. It can even be used for manipulations and mind games in a relationship. Your boyfriend is doing precisely that.
His jokes at your expense destroy your self-confidence, making it easier for him to manipulate and control you.
People with a strong sense of humor are often considered highly intelligent and skilled in manipulation.
Your boyfriend’s humor is often very sharp and brutal towards you. Remember your boyfriend’s nasty jokes about you when you gained a few extra pounds?
He may use humor as a defense mechanism. For example, if you two disagree about something he did, he might try to use jokes to deflect from the problem.
How to Deal With Your Boyfriend’s Annoying Humor?
While some say this isn’t too much of a problem in a relationship, we disagree.
Humor is an essential element in a relationship. However, it should not be annoying for one partner.
Here’s what you should do in this situation:
1. Reevaluate Your “Uptightness”
We know you think you are still fun and funny like you always were. However, it may not be as it seems to you.
Life brings various stresses and burdens, after which we will become exactly that annoying, nervous adult that we told ourselves we would never become.
Consider that your boyfriend’s humor may not be that bad. Try to relax and smile more.
2. Don’t Judge Your Boyfriend’s Sense of Humor
Unless it’s something highly offensive about sensitive topics, don’t be too judgmental about your boyfriend’s humor.
So what if he likes slapstick comedy? Does that make him less intellectual, then?
It is the right of every individual to laugh at things they find amusing as long as they don’t hurt others.
You can also introduce him to the types of humor you enjoy, and vice versa, to broaden each other’s perspectives.
3. Explain to Your Boyfriend That His Jokes Can Hurt Others
If your boyfriend is not very popular among his friends, his bad jokes can significantly contribute to that.
Maybe your boyfriend thinks he’s a “funny guy,” but the problem is that others don’t. Because he does not give up his sarcastic and unpleasant humor, he often finds himself in many problems.
Not everyone wants to listen to jokes, particularly if they are aimed at them.
So explain to your boyfriend that there is a time and a place for joking, and sometimes it’s better to skip the joking because not everyone is in the mood for it.
4. Let Your Boyfriend Know That He’s Hurting You
Similar to the previous tip, only this time, it’s about you.
Tell your boyfriend how his “amazing” sense of humor makes you feel.
Point him to the specific jokes or comments that bother you and explain why they are problematic. Ask him to be more considerate and avoid humor that can be hurtful.
Set clear boundaries with your boyfriend so his jokes don’t hurt or make you uncomfortable.
5. Consider the Possibility of a Bigger Problem in Your Relationship
An absence of emotional connection in a relationship can make you more sensitive to your boyfriend’s humor.
Even harmless jokes can feel annoying when you’re not feeling connected or valued.
Therefore, spend quality time together, engage in meaningful conversations, and make efforts to strengthen your bond. A stronger emotional connection can make you more tolerant of each other’s jokes.
The Bottom Line,
“Humor in a relationship is so important. Many women will say that. Some say, ‘If they can make you laugh, it’s the sexiest thing on earth”– Hellen Miller
If you think your boyfriend is a great guy, but he just needs to work on his humor a little, help him with that.
More importantly, don’t let his humor make you feel annoyed. Good luck!