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What Should I do When My Wife Doesn’t Want to Get Out of Bed?

Same scenario every day: You do not know how many times it happened to you that you get up in the morning, but your wife stays in bed for a long time.

Woman yawing on bed and rise hand to turn off alarm clock in the bedroom

That may not sound like too much of a problem. We are tired sometimes, and we have different sleep needs. But your wife not getting out of bed disturbs her and your daily routine, and you feel annoyed.

The term “doesn’t want to get out of bed” can mean that she often sleeps too long, or a more extreme variant when she spends almost all of her time in bed.

It’s one thing when your wife doesn’t get out of bed because she works all the time, and then she has to sleep for a long time to rest.

Before you start shouting at her about why she doesn’t get up, you better think about the reasons for that. Yelling at her is the worst possible solution.

What are the reasons why your wife does not want to get out of bed? Let’s find out!

She is a Night Bird

We don’t all function the same. You may be a person who likes to get up early, but your wife does not.

If she manages to finish her duties, why would it bother you that she doesn’t get up when you do? Don’t be a strict parent to your wife.

She is Disorganized and Unmotivated

How often has it happened that your wife sleeps through half the day, and then she’s mad because the whole day went by and she didn’t do anything because she was asleep?

Not getting out of bed at a decent time is a massive sign of disorganization. This lack of organization is reflected in all other aspects of your wife’s life and yours.

Maybe your house is messy, you eat fast food, and you have a pile of dirty laundry.

It is possible that your wife is not even motivated to get out of bed. She just doesn’t care when she gets up. Perhaps she is suffering from some of the problems we will discuss below.


Peaceful serene beautiful young lady wear pajamas lying asleep

We all like to sleep a little longer sometimes. When it’s the weekend,  when it’s raining outside, that is ok. But when it is repeated daily, we come to a concept that we cannot often hear: dysania.

The reason for not mentioning dysania is not discussed too much is that in medicine, it is not considered a disorder and does not have an official diagnosis, but it can cause many problems.

Dysania represents an individual’s extreme desire to stay in bed or the feeling of being unable to get out of bed.

Usually, getting up lasts 1 to 2 hours after waking up, but even that is enough to disrupt the daily routine.

Dysania may not seem serious, but it is often associated with more severe sleep disorders.

Sleep Disorders

Now we are getting to more serious disturbances. There are many types of sleep disorders. In this specific case, it is most often hypersomnia and narcolepsy.

Hypersomnia is a condition in which you feel extreme daytime sleepiness despite getting the sleep that should be adequate (or more than sufficient).

Narcolepsy is a neurological disorder characterized by an overwhelming desire to sleep.

This desire is so strong that it can completely disrupt the life of the person who suffers from it.

A person may fall asleep even during some activity.

These two sleep disorders are often associated with each other. Hypersomnia is more often considered a symptom, while narcolepsy is a serious medical condition.

Mental Health Disorders

Depressed woman can not sleep

The reason why your wife does not get out of bed can also be mental illnesses.

Most often, it is depression or anxiety. Insomnia is always associated with these disorders first. This is also logical because insomnia occurs in 75% of cases with people suffering from depression.

But mental illnesses can affect the fact that a person sleeps too much and does not want to leave the bed.

After all this, you have to ask yourself: What should you do when your wife doesn’t want to get out of bed?

Talk to Yourself and Reevaluate Your Relationship

Think carefully about what your wife was like before you started living together. Has she always had this need to spend the whole day in bed?

Then ask yourself how your relationship is doing in general. Is everything else ok, or is it just that your wife doesn’t want to leave the bed that is the stumbling block of your relationship?

In addition to thinking about her actions, you must also think about yours. You may also be the reason for her behavior. Maybe you imagined that marriage works differently.

That’s why her habit bothers you so much.

Leave the possibility that the problem may not be as big as you make it. If your wife manages to achieve all her duties and your relationship does not suffer, then there is no problem.

Not everyone has the same need for sleep. It might annoy you, but you have to put up with it.

Put yourself in her position, take everything into account, and take the next step.

Talk to Her and Show Understanding

Hispanic boyfriend smiling to his girlfriend after waking her up

Don’t act like a strict parent yelling at your child for sleeping too much. Show understanding towards your wife and the desire to solve her problem together.

It is essential to let her know that you are there for her. Also, point out how her habit affects her life and your relationship.

Offer her solutions to get out of the cycle of lack of motivation.

If the problem is more serious and involves sleep or mental disorders, suggest that she see a psychotherapist.

If your wife deliberately does not want to change that habit that harms your relationship despite all your efforts, maybe it’s time to consider whether you see yourself in such a relationship in the future.

To Conclude,

Don’t be selfish and expect your wife to wake up when you say so. But also, don’t let her not getting out of bed disrupt your relationship.

As we explained, there is often a more extensive background behind it. Show understanding and help your beloved wife eliminate that bad habit for her and for you.

Your relationship will blossom after that, and you will enjoy each other more.