You do not know how many times you have heard that the past should remain in the past.
It is a quote taken for granted, but it is not considered how difficult it can be. It is even more difficult if we are tormented by some of our mistakes from the past.
It is entirely natural to reminisce about the past. But reminiscing can go both ways.
The past is not just nostalgic pictures in family photo albums and fond memories of carefree days.
Traumas, insecurities, and feelings of guilt are also a part of the past that must not be ignored. Just as we like to remember good times, bad memories also haunt us.
By the past, we can mean something that happened recently or even in your childhood.
Also, under what you did in the past, you may be tormented by something wrong or something foolish and trivial, but you still keep returning to it.
If we allow ourselves to stay in the past and think about our mistakes, we will endanger our present and future.
Letting go of the mistakes of the past is hard, but here are some tips that will help you in that:
Acknowledge Past Mistakes
If thinking about the past is causing you problems now, you are aware of them. The first step in starting the process of letting go of the past is understanding the mistakes you made.
What were the mistakes? To whom? What are the consequences for you and others? These are all the questions you need to answer to get out of the circle of the past.
Face Your Fears
You’ve realized what fears and mistakes from the past are bothering you, and now it’s time to face them.
That process can be complicated, but the consequences can be much worse. Being stuck in the past can lead to various mental problems.
Do you want to solve past mistakes once you get the hang of them, or do you want them to always bother you and disturb your future?
Correct Your Past Mistakes
Do you think you made mistakes towards others or towards yourself?
If possible, you need to correct those mistakes because, obviously, that’s what your subconscious is asking you to do.
We often feel guilty if we have hurt someone in the past.
Guilt is there to tell us that we were wrong. This unpleasant feeling separates humans from beasts and forces us to be better in the future.
Wallowing in guilt is never a good solution. It is always better to work on how to correct the mistakes that led to it.
Again we come to the question of how many mistakes are these and how to correct them. Is it possible to correct them at all? It is better to try something instead of sitting in a blank spot and doing nothing.
Accept responsibility for your mistakes, and work to repair the damage you have caused to yourself or others.
For example, if you didn’t help a good friend when he needed it, tell him that next time you are there for him, and be sure to be there this time.
Have Your Own Redemption Arc
You know in the movies when some character who was evil does some remarkable good thing, and then everyone changes their minds about him?
He usually sacrifices himself to save the main character. You don’t have to literally sacrifice yourself, but you can have your own way of redemption.
It is human nature to want to correct a wrong done to someone. We want to fix it, as we expect the same in the opposite case.
When you correct what you did in the past, you feel peace in your head, and it is easier for you to move on.
Be Realistic and Kind to Yourself
Everyone makes mistakes. Nobody is perfect, not even you. This should not be an excuse after making mistakes, but it must be understood as a fact.
Not all mistakes can be corrected. And some mistakes are not even worth mentioning, no matter how much they bother you right now.
We all have some baggage from the past. It’s important how we treat it and don’t let it control our life.
Are you wondering how to be good to yourself when you have made mistakes that are bothering you now?
You cannot beat yourself down because of the past. It is up to you to try to correct them and come to terms with the past.
Learn from past mistakes
“Your best teacher is your last mistake.”
Ralph Nader
Our ability to learn from past mistakes is one of our most important qualities. That mistake you made can be a life lesson.
For example: If your business failed because of bad marketing, you will know next time that you must invest in marketing. Sounds too simple, but it’s true.
Mistakes are an inevitable part of life, so why not learn from them?
To move on is to grow, so allow yourself to grow from your mistakes.
Forgive Yourself
Forgiving yourself for past mistakes is long and hard but necessary to move on.
Every sleepless night, when your brain reminds you of what you did in the past instead of letting you sleep, is often necessary for the process of forgiveness.
Whatever it is, you deserve forgiveness for past mistakes if you’ve worked to correct them and learned from them.
To Sum it All Up,
It is time to apply all the mentioned ways to deal with past mistakes.
We cannot hide past mistakes in some hidden parts of our brain because they will find a way to surface and haunt us.
The present and the future can be much more beautiful when the past does not interfere to spoil everything. We should carry good memories from the past and lessons instead of bad memories.
Leave the past. Embrace the present. Let the future unfold.